WHAT I LEARNED FROM COCO AND CUP HOLDERS
It’s Black Friday, we’re in a pact movie theater (thank goodness for reserved seating) and my husband and I get there just when the previews are about to start. By the way, what’s up with the 20-minute Frozen mini clip that made me think we were in the wrong movie theatre?
We get to our seats and I put my stainless-steel bottle water in the cup holder to my left and open my chocolates as the previews start. Two guys arrive two minutes later and one of them sits next to me. He’s about to put his drink in the cup holder and he goes ‘Oh!’ as he sees that my drink is there. I notice this and I immediately move my bottle assuming I had put it in the wrong cup holder. When I move my cup I notice my husband drink is to my right. So I tell him,
“hey, put your drink on the other side.”
“The drinks go to the left,” he says.
“Oh! Well he already put his drink there.”
“Well, tell him the drinks go to the left.”
“No” I hate getting into discussions especially in a movie theatre and when the Frozen clip is starting. Bu there I am, with my bottle in between my legs because I have nowhere to put it. And then I think, “Really? You’re 31 and you can’t speak up about something so simple.”
So I say to the guy, “I think the drinks go to the left”
And he immediately jumps and with an Italian-like excitement he says, “No! The drinks go to the right!”
“Okay.” This was enough standing up for myself for a day.
“Do you want me to go ask?”
“No, that’s okay” I say as I shake my head apologetically.
He didn’t move his drink and he stood up and left. My husband asks the girl next to him if he can put his drink in the cup holder between them, and she agrees. He moved his drink and I finally put my drink to my right. The guy missed the whole Frozen mini clip and he came back with popcorn. Whew! And here I was thinking that he actually asked the staff about the cup holder etiquette. A few minutes later, he moves his drink to his left, and lets me know that the cup holder is available and I let him know that I already placed my bottle to the right.
Coco starts and I’m immediately in love on how beautifully and accurately the Mexican culture is portrayed: from the pan dulce, to the chancla, to the music, to the beautiful old lady Coco. It reminded me about my family and it made me appreciate my culture and traditions (even though I never did follow the Dia de los Muertos tradition, but now I really want to).
It made me reflect how our life dreams call us, sometimes to our own detriment, it seems. But ultimately, our life dream leads to healing, love and fulfillment, so we just have to trust it. The movie Coco inspired me to take a stand even if people in my life don’t agree and want me to conform (which is also rooted in love).
I cry, my heart is filled, the movie ends, I applaud (which I only remember doing before in the first Sex And The City movie). The credits start and the guy says,
“Hey, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry, have a good night,” I say with a smile.
As always, my husband and I stay until the end of the credits, my husband says it’s respectful to the moviemakers. As we stand up to leave I see the theatre staff cleaning and I say to one of them,“Hey, just out of curiosity, do the drink go to the left or to the right?” And she responds “A gentleman was asking the same thing earlier, but it really depends on your preference.” Funny that we ended up asking the same person.
Huh? So we were both right. We had opposing views, yet we were both right. We were also both wrong, but only in thinking that the other person was wrong. But I really want to remember that feeling that I don’t have to shove-it-in-your-face, ha-ha, take-that, for me to be right. I can be right, and someone else can be right and we can think completely different. I don’t have to put anyone down for me to be right. This felt so spacious, generous and comforting, just like when Miguel and Coco sing. This idea of ‘we can both be right’ has the potential to change so much, to heal so many of us.
I also learned that I shouldn’t move my cup, I shouldn’t immediately assume I’m wrong, but this is a whole other conversation for another blog post. Now I’m thinking, if a cup holder taught me so much how can I apply this to other areas of my life? What do I feel defensive and rigid about? When do I feel like only my way can be the right way?
Over to you! Where do think you can apply the ‘we can both be right’ in your life? What did you learn from Coco?
